Gash Gash. Die.

You're my world
The shelter from the rain ..
You're the pills
That take away my pain..
You're the light
That helps me find my way ..
You're the words
When I have nothing to say..

You're the fire
That warms me when I'm cold ..
You're the hand I have to hold as I grow old ..
You're the shore when I am lost at sea ..
You're the only thing
That I like about me ..

And in this world where nothing else is true..
Here I am
Still tangled up in you.

I'm still tangled up in you ...

Imagine being pushed into a dark abyss of pain.
Imagine the dementors feeding on the most unhappiest of your memories.
Imagine being stabbed repeatedly- repeatedly until there's no blood left in your veins.

Imagine a never ending feeling of nothingness.
That's all i feel now.

PS - The words in italics : not my words but definitely my thoughts.

Melancholic Outburst I

The sound of thunder rang through the sky that afternoon.
Everyone was busy packing their bags. She stared at the shadow cast by the giant willow tree outside the window. She saw the lone drop of rainfall fall upon its dark green leaf and just then her eyes welled up.
" Shut up you fool ! ", screamed her mind. She has never cried in front of someone.
" Weaklings cry, are you an idiot?"
Her mothers words ran through her mind every time this happened. No, she was not weak and yes, crying was for the weak.

The afternoon began the usual way - with long lectures that seldom made sense. With pages and pages of meaningless words being noted down on empty sheets of paper.
Just then her beautiful friend stormed in while she was caught up with a reverie - an unpleasant one. Yes, this friend - she was beautiful and she always made everyone smile. That afternoon, she smiled her enigmatic smile and told her , " i am in love".

Love.
The pain grew stronger with every day. But did it matter?
Hugs were exchanged. Pleasantries too.
But something inside pinched. Pinched,ached and burnt.
No, she didn't mean to sound selfish - to herself.
But the pain commenced nonetheless.

She hadn't known happiness for a while now. She had forgotten how to smile without pushing down the pain deep inside her. Smile her carefree smile.
She didn't find it difficult to keep up with this charade - she had learned to live with it.
It was as easy as breathing.

Her friend was in love. Her phone vibrated every 3minutes. She flashed a carefree smile.
She spoke of the future - a future with the man she loved.

And she?
What about her?

Then again, does it matter?